Blog journal

Wrong Feelings

I know nothing - I am nothing - - that I am always wrong. Or was this feeling - conveyed - wrong as well?

“Everything I say is stupid”
“Everything I say is wrong”
“Every feeling I convey is nothing”

And now you hated I have become.
At least that is what I felt – because you would not tell me.
But because of what I am – What I have become.

You would ask me for my opinion
– but was it just to tell me that I know nothing?
You would ask me for my feelings
– but you would sweep them under the rug
Or even times, you would tell me that my own feelings were wrong.

You would ask me why I hated having conversations with you,
what do you think?

Because you make me feel I am stupid,
Because you make me feel that my opinions has no value to anyone,
Because you make me feel that my feelings are best bottled in,
Because I want to escape feeling this way.
It hurts.

Even I hate me all the time, and especially so when I am around you.
It is so hard to change – I want to change – when there is a voice in me telling me that.

I know nothing –
I am nothing –
– that I am always wrong.
Or was this feeling – conveyed – wrong as well?

It is so hard to try and understand each other – I want to understand you – when both us are just dancing around the miscommunications that is bound to happen everytime.

Words have power – especially from a Father to a Son.

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